Let Them See You

10 . 20 . 11

I was seventeen, Shaun was closing in on nineteen when we went to the cabin. The idea wasn’t our own, rather a gentle nudge from a friend who knew we needed that trip more than we realized at the time. I’m thankful for his wisdom. Although we had been dating for nearly a year, I don’t think it was until that trip that we really saw each other. Saw each other’s heart; the joy and pain and the fear that lay tucked beneath the surface, the façade we for different reasons clung to.

There were swings at the cabin, up the hill from lakeshore. It was barely raining that day, and we sat on the swings and let the wind fill the silence between us. We were both confused. I remember starting to cry, feeling that nudge again coming with the rain.  Shaun turned to me and said “you’ve got to let me in.”

I attempted to start this post with a question, how many people in your life really see you? Following it with another, now how many people do you really see? I felt stuck — wanting to make a point about how often we go through the weeks and months surrounded by people believing we see them and know them, when in reality we don’t really at all. But that would be the obvious question.

I dropped Shaun off at the airport earlier in the morning and felt a pang of sadness that we will be spending another one of his birthdays apart. The morning was crisp when we hugged goodbye, and the clouds considered a bout of rain. I drove away and thought of the cabin. Five years. It felt like a long time ago. I thought about how far we’ve come as individuals, as a couple. I thought about what today would have been like if we had put off that trip to Alaska and his grandparents cabin.

The better question is this, who do you let see you? Why do you (we) hold back from allowing people to really see us for who we really are? We must work to be present and truly see others, but we must also work to trust that it’s okay to let others see our own true selves too. It’s scary. I know. But we may be seen when we let ourselves be seen. Maybe not always, but when we do, there will be opportunity and occasion for people who do want to see us, and we will not feel alone.

Click here to keep reading for recipe… 

To make Pumpkin Gnocchi, you’ve got to use your inherent culinary intuition. Pumpkins come in all shapes and sizes, so it’s difficult to quantify ingredients without knowing the variety you’ve chosen and how much it will yield. Here are some rough guidelines:

Pumpkin Gnocchi

  • 1/2 of one med/large cooking pumpkin, we like Musquee De Provence
  • 2 (ish) cups of unbleached white whole wheat flour
  • 1 egg, or 2 if your pumpkin gives you more than 2 cups puree
  • salt and pepper to taste
  • 4 tbsp butter
  • 2 tbsp olive oil
  • A few sprigs of thyme
  • (optional) freshly grated parmesan

Cut open your pumpkin and scoop out the seeds and stringy bits. Wrap one half, and store for later. Cut remaining half into slices like you would a cantaloupe. Depending on your variety, you may be able to peel the skin, otherwise carefully remove with a knife and cut skinless pumpkin into 1″ cubes.

Toss pumpkin into a large saucepan and cover with water. Bring to a boil and cook until just softened, adding more water if necessary. Strain softened pumpkin into a large colander, and again through a fine mesh sieve a few cups at a time, pressing out the liquid with a wooden spoon or spatula. Resturn mashed pumpkin to the dry saucepan and add a pat or two of butter. Return to the stove over low heat for about 5 minutes to just melt the butter and evaporate the remaining water. Transfer to a food processor and blitz until smooth. While blitzing, bring a large pot of water to a boil.

Turn pureed pumpkin into a large bowl. Add egg(s) and salt and pepper before folding in the flour, 1/2 cup at a time. When you have added enough flour to produce a dough like consistency and forms a ball, turn out the ball onto a floured surface and knead a few times, adding a bit of flour if needed, until the dough no longer sticks to your hands. Take a small section of the dough and roll out into a thin rope. Cut into 1″ sections and make indents on four sides with a wet fork. Repeat with remaining dough. Warning, this makes A LOT. Place half of the finished gnocchi on a floured baking sheet and freeze for up to two hours before placing them together in a freezer bag.

Place gnocchi a dozen at a time in the boiling water. Cook until they all float to the top. Meanwhile, bring a saucepan with butter, olive oil, salt, pepper, and thyme to medium heat until the butter melts and you’ve coaxed the aroma out of the herbs. Set aside. Repeat boil process with remaining gnocchi. Toss in the butter/oil mixture, and enjoy.

  • amazing. seriously. the words, video, your pretty self…high frickin’ five.

  • What a beautiful post. I’ve always wanted to make Pumpkin Gnocchi but haven’t ever tried!

  • Love, love, love! The video, the words, the recipe. You guys did a great job on this.

  • Holy yum. Love that you did a video for this. Gnocchi is one of those “judge it by the feel” kind of techniques so it’s just perfect. Looks like it was messy and fun :)

  • this is so beautiful – everything!

  • Thanks, once again, for the deep and real thoughts and the sharing of food—the videos you post are amazing!

  • I love gnocchi of all kinds … these seem delicious ! great video.

  • Perfection. Sheer perfection. I love everything about this post—the story (had no idea you guys had been together so long), your message (I struggle to let people in), the video, obviously! and your wonderful wholesome recipe. I just assumed that gnocchi required a pasta machine like most other pastas, I’m glad to know it doesn’t. Love!

  • Those are my favorite kind of cooking pumpkin too (fairy tale pumpkin!). I think I needed the reminder, though—-about how special those people are that ‘see’ us, and how we’re taking that relationship for granted if we don’t allow them in when we should.

  • kelsey + shaun, what an amazingly beautiful post! I absolutely love and appreciate every second that went into making the video. Food is not meant to be frozen in time, but touched and cooked and eaten. Thanks for reminding me of that. And great writing as always – thank you!

  • Thank you for the powerful reminder. Maybe I need to let more people “in”.

  • What an absolutely beautiful post, I’m seriously in tears. The video was amazing, the story is touching, and the gnocchi look delicious!

  • Stunning post, Kelsey. It’s hard to let people in, especially if you’ve been hurt in the past, but I think that it’s best to live raw, and know that opening up to people is the only way to discover something truly beautiful about them…and yourself.

  • All I can say is, absolutely beautiful and spoken truly from the heart.

  • Once again, so lovely! Video, writing, pictures. You are great!

  • Love it! Great post Kelsey! xx

  • Lovely post! You found some pretty, pretty pumpkins and the gnocci looks divine. Well done!

  • A very thoughtful post, one that I will ponder for a good while…

  • Absolutely beautiful!! The writing, video, photos, recipe – everything. Hugs to you my dear.

  • Just stumbled here from tastespotting, and wow, thanks for this — such a good message and the gnocci looks plump and delicious! I love savory pumpkin recipes, and made a savory pumpkin pizza recently that was amazing. It’s kind of neat that the themes we wrote about in our two posts about pumpkin kind of come together, too!

    It’s at http://eggton.wordpress.com/2011/10/21/space-camp-1992-and-savory-pumpkin-pizza/

    Thanks again and take care.

  • Stunning. Lovely. You guys are wonderful!! Thanks for the gnocchi recipe + the fun video :)

  • looks so delicious!

  • Wow—I really needed to hear this message today. Thanks, as always, Kelsey.

  • I absolutely adore your blog. From your storytelling to your videos to your recipes, it’s all incredible.

    Thank you for sharing it all with us.

    PS: Did I catch a glimpse of Mark Bittman’s How to Cook Everything in your video? That’s my favorite cookbook by far.

  • I so enjoyed watching this video, as well as reading your thoughtful post. It definitely takes courage to let others see you. Sometimes our natural instinct is to do the opposite!

  • You know I love our recipes, but this one might be the best of all. So beautiful, and so seasonal. I’ve made gnocchi once before, and your recipe makes me want to try it again. Lovely, lovely, lovely.

  • great topic, i have trust issues so hard for me to let people see me. but the more you are around me and get to know me, i do think i finally let people in

    this looks great! perfect fall meal

    and love love the video!!!

  • Absolutely LOVE the video, looking forward to more. This just might be the recipe I’m looking forward to the most this Fall. I just tweeted about it too! Follow me @FashionIntel if you’d like.

  • I never had pumpkin gnocchis. This looks so delicious, yum. It’s a great idea, so creative.

  • aww. this is lovely.

  • Why didn’t I see this earlier? Love the video, so beautiful, and the gnocchi look very delicious.

  • sherane prish

    Beautiful:)

  • Awesome video. Beautiful story. Lovely recipe. Great job Kelsey!!

  • Beautiful! everything about this post is just beautiful

  • Hello, found your gnocchi on tastespotting, look soooooo good. thank you so much for the awesome video.

  • these look amazing! what a great way to use pumpkin – Yum!

  • Your photos are so beautiful, I could look at them all day.

  • The only think I love more than this video/recipe itself is the fact that you decided on a Radical Face tune to tell the story! I’m such a huge fan of Ben Cooper’s work, and I got super giddy and felt connected to you and the video the second that the video started. Stunning stuff, guys.

Trackbacks

  1. What We’re Reading: Week Of 10.31.11 «
  2. Sunday Favorites | the kitchen generation
  3. Garden to Table |
  4. Double Chocolate Chip Cherry Cookies
  5. Pumpkin Gnocchi « elvisbreakfast
  6. 10 Delicious Pumpkin Recipes For Fall
  7. Earthsprout – Go Green Hot´n Healthy Spiced Pumpkin Burrito + something found - me » Earthsprout - Go Green Hot´n Healthy

Let's get in Touch

I wish I could make coffee dates with you all. In the meantime, feel free to drop me a line with questions, comments, concerns, or just to say Hi. I like that. There is nothing more uplifting than an email from a a fresh contact or kindred spirit.

I can be reached through this contact form and at happyolks [at] gmail [dot] com.